It’s not so long ago that bacon was shunned by many people. Religious people wouldn’t go near the food and vegetarians thought that they were heart disease sticks. Most people on this website would enjoy waking up early in the morning to the smell of bacon and eggs which became a breakfast tradition. It seems that eating bacon for breakfast isn’t enough anymore and people need to have their bacon fix at any moment like it’s some kind of energy-fueled drug. The first major breakthrough came when food manufacturers were able to distribute pre-cooked bacon. Bacon contains lots of juicy fat that is very easy to splatter when cooking it so it only made sense to make bacon that you could easily shove into a microwave and avoid any hot oils hitting your face and leaving you scarred for life.

One big hit was the invention of baconnaise. This mayo substitute was starting to give people second thoughts at the drive-thru counter when they would use the phrase ‘Please hold the mayo’. Move over ketchup as a new sheriff is in town to take over the condiment world. The company recommends you to put this stuff on sandwiches, dips, sauces and salads. Heck, even vegetarians will love this stuff since it’s got a simulated bacon-like taste without any real bacon in it! If baconnaise wasn’t a good enough substitute for the mayo on your burger – why not try bacon squeeze. Bacon squeeze is a great alternative to the lazy BBQ master who simply didn’t have enough time to throw some bacon strips on the old propane tanker. You can put some bayonnaise on the bun and then add some bacon squeeze for a finishing touch to your burger once all the other condiments have been added to the burger.

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Many fast food restaurants are running out of ideas for new promotions and are trying to garner interest in their products by trying to merge products together into some type of Frankenstein fast food creation. The popularity of viral videos showing amateur cooks attempting to make weird concoctions of various different foods has given marketing executives the ability to green light weird new foods in an attempt to get their franchises some publicity. Here are a few of these brand new food items that you may have come across at a fast food establishment near you.

-Subway has always been home to the meatball sub but lately they’ve been trying to cater to the pizza audience with new flat bread pizzas.It came full circle for Subway when they decided to simply make a sub sandwich with pizza ingredients. Enjoy spicy pepperoni, piled high and layered with melt-a-licious cheese and their signature marinara sauce.

-Cici’s decided to take everyone’s favorite side dish and put it on a pizza. I guess enticing people with all-you-can-eat pizza at the buffet wasn’t enough of a promotional tool for the restaurant chain. Tender cavatappi pasta and macaroni and cheese sauce topped with shredded Italian pizza cheese on our traditional crust. This will certainly bring the kid out in anyone but we’d prefer a nice slice of pepperoni and to simply put the mac & cheese on the side.

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Fresh food is delicious. We can’t deny the benefits of fresh meat, fruits or vegetables. However, we’re a busy generation that loves to shove frozen junk out of a box and shove it into a warm pot, oven or microwave. They’re many frozen foods out on the market that will give you the equivalent of a home cooked meal. We prefer frozen foods that are quick to make, easy to eat (and a bonus if no utensils are involved) and are just as enjoyable to eat compared to a fresh hot meal. Here’s a rundown of some of our favorite frozen foods in your freezer aisle at the local grocery store.

-A taquito is a Mexican food dish most often consisting of a small rolled-up tortilla and some type of filling, including beef, cheese or chicken. We like these because you have the choice of either nuking them in the microwave or waiting longer for a crisp fried texture if you put them in the oven. They go great with ranch dip, salsa or sour cream. We’re happy to announce that the USA government requires all taquito manufacturers to sell taquitos that contain at least 15% meat. So, if you’re worried about your meat intake or simply worried about what’s inside these things – we’re happy to announce that at least you’re getting some form of meat inside these puppies at all times.

-We don’t need to produce a film about trying to locate the nearest White Castle fast food franchise when we can simply pick up a few of their sliders in the frozen foods aisle of our local grocery store. These burgers only require a warm napkin to wrap around them and can be put in the microwave for two minutes. The bun tastes a bit soggy but the meat is nice ans steamed and comes topped with caramelized onions. They come packaged as two in a pair but we can’t comment on how well your stomach will adjust to them after eating a few if you get the late night munchies.

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We searched the internet far and wide to try and find some new and interesting food gadgets that will make it even lazier to cook food or simply make it taste better. Here’s a selection of some of the new and unique products that we were able to find on the net.

-Did you ever feel like less of a man when you had to shake that ketchup bottle for over 15 minutes until a tiny bit of ketchup came out and covered only a portion of your fries? Do you like guns? Do you feel lonely and naked without the feeling of a gun in your hand every couple of seconds? Well, do we ever have a product for you! This device comes with two reusable cartridges and you can get perfect ketchup and mustard lines on your hot dogs every single time. It’s also perfect for writing your name into your burgers or to simply shoot and keep predators away from your BBQ.

-We as a human species like to mark our territory. Some people like to own a large lot of land and build a huge fence to protect it while others will start a fist fight if you simply look at their girlfriend the wrong way. It’s not enough to simply put food on the grill and have your friends and family enjoy your gift of a meal. You need to send them a reminder of just who spent the time to cook this feast for them and let them know about it every time that they lift their forks to their mouths and take a bite of it. This unique branding iron can be customized with a variety of letters so the grill master can write just about anything on his delicious work of art.

-It can be annoying having to constantly get up from the couch to go and fetch yourself another beer. That’s why the beer belt was invented. Now, you can hold six, twelve or fourteen ounce cans around your waist. Each belt is constructed with waterproof ballistic nylon and will fit up to a 58 inch waist. Perfect for NASCAR events, family reunions, school musicals and baby showers.
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We here at BoobNewb are big fans of Doritos tortilla chips. Unfortunately, Canada (or should I say Quebec?) is a wasteland when it comes to the distribution of these chips. There have been over 102 different flavors of Doritos chips and the Frito-Lay corporation currently distributes over 20 different varieties of the chips in the USA. In Canada, we’re lucky to maybe get three of these flavors. There’s the always reliable nacho cheese flavored Doritos and two other random varieties that are always changing and never very satisfying which then forces people back to the good old nacho cheese ones. In 2010, we were lucky enough to finally have a ranch version of these chips sold here after having been sold in the USA for well over a decade.

Doritos tortilla chips actually began in 1964 as unused tortillas where a company-owned restaurant cut them up and fried them and added basic seasoning. A bigwig at Frito-lay noticed the popularity of the chips and struck a deal with the company to expand and sell them in other regions of the state. Doritos were released nationwide in 1966, the first tortilla chip to be launched nationally in the United States. The chips are now a 4 billion $ a year operation and are second in sales only behind Frito-lay’s other dominant brand of Lay’s potato chips.

We decided to look back at some of the different varieties of Doritos chips that have been sold just to show how many different combinations the company has come up with over the years in order to satisfy the demand of their loyal tortilla chip eaters.

-Numerous impromptu online support groups have sprung up over the years among devoted fans who miss the original Doritos Taco flavor formula. In late 2010, the taco flavor recipe that was used in the 1980s returned in a limited edition ‘retro’ styled bag incorporating the original Doritos logo, and in early 2011 the company announced that this incarnation would remain in the permanent product line-up. There’s another version that came out called ‘Doritos at Midnight’ that tasted as though you took a chip and put some Old El Paso taco powder on them and they were god awful. Thankfully, they brought back these timeless chips for a little while longer.
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